> # Helping my lover

> Written by Lilgirl at 03 Jan 2000 07:23:29:

> As an answer to: Thank you!!!! written by Dave in Northampton, UK at 02 Jan 19100 02:02:47:

> Thanks, Dave, for your post - I wondered for a moment if you were MY Dave!

> My Dave - the lover in question - is 40, and has what I think is secondary phimosis. We've only been dating a few weeks, and we haven't been able to have sex because he loses his erection, I think because of the pain when he becomes erect and tries to penetrate.

> I'd never seen a foreskin that couldn't retract before, and he says that it's developed fairly recently. I've been reading about conservative methods of treatment, and hope to find one that works without him having to be circumcised, fully or partially.

> He's in the UK, and I'd like to know if there are any reliable steroid creams prescribed for this condition. My chief concern is that because it's secondary, it may not stretch, although he says it will stretch sufficiently when he's in the shower so that he can bathe his glans properly. Overall, it sounds like it's the lichenoid variety, but without proper histology, we won't know.

> And yes, he's going to the doctor about it as soon as possible!

> Failing the creams treatment, has anyone out there had the 'dorsal slit' procedure, and if so, how awful is it?

> Yes, women do care. Well, I do, anyway!

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The Origins of a Taboo